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Search Results 0 to 9 of about 10 (some duplicates have been removed)
Comedy Central
Jan 21, 2013 11:00pm PST
ourselves, what's more important? that the right man is elected president or that star wars is with people who will protect it most? [twinkling] [tauntaun mewls] - unit four, what is it? over? - well, kid? - well, if you put it that way... - come in, unit four! what have you found? - nothing, sir. we just found some tremendous deals on cars nobody wants, that's all. barkley, out. - no! but obama wasn't really elected. don't you people care? - [choral singing] ♪ obama ♪ is president ♪ again captioning sponsored by comedy central from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. the guest tonight, listen to this, settle down. supreme court justice, that's right, today on the show, supreme court... thank you very much -- supreme court justice sonnia sotomayor ( cheers and applause ) unless i believe she's coming out here. unless this is another elaborate hoax by manti te'o nemesis ronaiah tuiasosopo or as the germans refer to him (speaking nonsense). some
Comedy Central
Jan 15, 2013 11:00pm PST
in a great while. haley's comet fly by, a mets world series win, dick morris accurating calling an election. [ laughter ] then there's the rarest of the rare, the certificate of thing they are foretold in prophecy and never dream you yourself would live with. >> justice clarence thomas broke a sen year silence on the supreme court. >> jon: why would one of the justices keep completely quiet for so long unless -- ursula the sea witch stole his voice when he fell in love with a human! i have little kids. [ laughter ] but there must be a reason clarence thomas doesn't like to speak publicly. [ laughter ] there must be a reason that he keeps silent that doesn't involve him being a merman. he has done interviews. >> the perception is that -- critics will say you are not smart enough, you are insecure. >> jon: they make fools out of themselves with those kinds of comments. [ laughter ] >> jon: that's y. that's not really his voice. sorry. we changed it for humorous effect. here is his real voice. >> they make fools out of themselves with those kind of comments. [ laughter ] >> jon: now, i know wh
Comedy Central
Jan 17, 2013 11:00pm PST
with the unpleasant sensation of losing elections which we just had. if obama were a tyrant are these the numbers he would put up? tyrants don't have to fight that (bleep) hard for ohio. and generally -- generally. [cheers and applause] ing for about utterly tanking your first debate, tyrants don't show up for those. the real debate for tyrants is how big you want to go with the sunglasses? i guess it's summed by the old homily first they came for the guns and i said nothing because >> jon: welcome back. the president has taken bold action with his recent executive action but not every idea coming from the white house works out as plan. >> we're launching an online tool called we the people to allow the americans to directly petition the white house. >> jon: have you met us? it was the grandest experience in direct democracy since jefferson allow ever american to suggest policy after the carrier pigeon was discontinued for hygienic regions. that photo was not retouched. it was a noble effort. only 5,000 signatures needed to get an official government response which was a low ball. did they not how t
Search Results 0 to 9 of about 10 (some duplicates have been removed)